I know what you’re thinking, “Jami! The last time you posted was in 2014…why? Why now?”. Well friends, may you rest assured that I honestly do not know.

Last year, my New Year’s resolution went so well (giving up soda for all of 2015) that I thought I might try to make a new one – blogging once a week for all of 2016. That’s 52 blogs with which you will have the opportunity to grace yourself.

When I first began this blog, it was because I had felt a strong calling from God to start it. I have never really like the idea of blogs, and when I would have to do them for school, or as part of my Youth Encounter ministry team, I never knew what to write, or why anyone would want to read anything I had to say.

I was thinking about what my New Year’s resolution might be, and when my friend said that she was going to be vlogging for the whole year, I remembered my blog. I started thinking about my blog and when the last time it was that I has posted (which is apparently July 31, 2014), and I began to reflect on the time when God called me to start the blog.

I started to think of God’s calling on our lives as a covenant, something he asks us to do and we either agree to it, ignore it, or say no. When he called me to start this blog, I agreed and for a small bit of time, I kept up my end of the bargain. But then, I stopped writing blogs. I don’t remember why – probably because I got busy, or couldn’t think of anything to write about, or some other terrible reason. I never really stopped thinking about it though. It kept popping up for me time and time again, and a feeling of guilt swept over me because I had let down my Heavenly Father.

I don’t believe that God guilts us in to doing anything, but I do know that when I was reflecting on God’s call for me to start this blog, that I began thinking of why it was so easy to stop following that calling. Why was I able to do 2 years of day and night ministry and never question my calling to do it? Why was it so easy to give up on the simple task of blogging where I can literally write about anything?

Time and time again throughout scripture, God proves to us that he upholds his end of the deal 100% of the time. He consistently does what he says he will do, and he never forsakes his people, even when they turn away from him. I mean just look at pretty much any story about the Israelites, and you’ll think, “Sheesh! What’s wrong with these people – get it together, fools!”. Yet, here I am constantly letting him down like a big Israelite slap in the face, and he is always there to say, “Let’s try that again, my child” with no judgment because he sees us through the lens of the cross.

For me, it was easy to stop blogging because for some reason, I find it easier to let God down, then to let down the people around me, which makes me think, “Really, Jami!?” During my volunteer ministry with Youth Encounter, I felt a responsibility to my teammates, and to the staff of Youth Encounter and to my sponsors who were making it possible for me to be on the road. I didn’t want to disappoint them.

But with something as simple as keeping up with blog, I was okay with letting down the only one who has never let me down? Then, I was convicted. Not out of guilt, but out of a challenge from God to grow. To grow in my ability to hold up the end of my covenant. I don’t know why God asked me to start this blog all that time ago, or what His plans are for it or the people who may or may not read it, but I do know that I need to work on upholding my end of the deal. Not only with this blog, but also with everything else.

God has placed us to be in community with one another. So I ask that this tiny blog community of whoever of you chooses to read, help me stay true to this calling. I don’t think it was a mistake that God surrounded me with those people on team – friends, family, sponsors, teammates, YE staff. I know he was using my relationships with each of those people to help me stay true to that calling so that His work would be done in the people that I ministered to, and in myself.

The word ‘resolution’ is typically defined in two ways(according to Google dictionary) and I feel both apply to my current relationship with God and with his calling, big or small, in my life:

1. A firm decision to do or not do something
2. The action of solving a problem, dispute, or contentious matter

So, friends, I invite you to join me in this journey of 2016 with my resolution to remember God’s calling and blog at least once a week. As you can see I have already waited until the last day of the first week to blog (but hey, I did it!) and I pray that I grow in this time, and that God uses me to speak truth and love into your lives as you journey through this year and this insane life we live.